Thorns in Me

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

My stiff fingers shaped the melody-
Of my longing, my love, and my pain.
Notes and vibrant chords trembled far-
Into this night of thunder and rain.
Tomorrow I will arrange to go somewhere.
Anywhere, alone, and I must wrestle…
With my soul alone, or, if not tomorrow-
At least the day after, as soon as I nestle
Into nothing that is not true….
Far down in my dreams, drifting, shining…
Mirrored in the stars, my heart is sinking-
Under the August moon, we are dining.
The hour of us is so enchanting.
How could beauty bring only pain?
Somewhere on the well-beaten path,
I lay my heartache down in vain.
My pride once sustained me.
Is beginning to fail me now
What is my one excuse?
Troublesome question, “How?”
How did our tension increase?
If only I could forget, the breaking point…
Blindness of my lover did not last.
My roses drop their petals, no longer joint.
Drawing in deep breathes, my heart is free.
A stranger enters the gates in hopes to-be
Listening to the music, hours wrong, off-key.
My piano and I hum, “what’s wrong with me?”
The sound of my heart is very faint.
I wonder where my last lover can be…
The man who watches can hear my cry.
I wake with feeling hope still left in me.

 

© Sonya Rose

My Offering

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

This is my offering,
so simple and true—
for the One
who made me and you.
This is my story,
written in a line,
completing a circle
daily in thine-
love of color.
This I know:
I will never
let Him go
into the wind…
so far away.
He is always here
completing this day.
I offer Him my life
to mold as His will.
Here is my gift
which he does fulfill.
In a world of evermore,
I see my heart,
endless love
from the very start.

 

© Sonya Rose

The Hurricane and The Rainbow

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

One night, my house was blown away
by a hurricane on the night I forgot to pray.
In the morning, I was lost and never me.
Searching for my place, I lost my will at sea.
What kept me from drowning—was the warmth of the sun.
I stretched out my arms to hold someone.
It was the arms of hope that helped me
and the hands of faith that made me see-
on a journey of joy and ecstasy.
Looking back at shore, I ran alongside many lovers.
Some ahead I will slowly discover:
There is no holding back today.
Love is free, free to find a way-
to set its pace and ride with destiny.
And soon, my strength of being free-
will collapse from this run
and cling onto the sun.
I’ll drop on a rainbow and lie down to die.
Look for me in the starry sky.
The colors of my heart, the vision of a rainbow…
My love remains forever, even as I go.

 

© Sonya Rose

Four Seasons

December 21, 2008 § 1 Comment

 

I called her
to turn around…
She kept walking
without a sound.
She faded in the blue
of the ocean and sky.
Never a chance, summer,
to say goodbye.
Fall came,
so beautiful, indeed;
he left behind a trail
of leaves and a seed.
So, I picked up
this seed and into my hand
turned to ice;
then, disappeared in land.
As Winter went away,
he passed Spring.
I smiled
at her opening.

 

© Sonya Rose

Oceanic Dreams

December 21, 2008 § 2 Comments

 

He covers my body at night,
A blanket once so tight-
Draped around my skin,
I hardly could breathe in
The suite of stale air
Tonight, I am lying here bare,
Dreaming of my inner child
Roses are growing wild.
In my secret garden,
Encircled by children,
I laugh as we hold hands.
And spin in the sands.
Falling down on our knees,
We gather in three’s.
Then, two’s,
We search for clues.
In the deep ocean
All this extra emotion
Carries me, Alone-
I sleep now with the unknown.

 

© Sonya Rose

Pursuit of Happiness

December 21, 2008 § 8 Comments

 

Why do you smile-
when you see no direction?
How can you love all the while-
when you feel no affection?
Perhaps, happiness
is waiting around the bend:
A prestigious job to miss,
an idea to set a trend…
A place of paradise
to spend with love,
able to reach fortune—so nice
somewhere above…

 

Take time to break free.
A flight to nowhere
in the end, you’ll see
may lead to somewhere.
You are your own pilot, too,
flying through poor visibility…
See people counting on you.
Find and keep our true ability.
So smile and laugh a little…
Let all worries part for a day.
Enjoy the little things in life’s riddle;
Your happiness can be found today.

 

© Sonya Rose

Meditation

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

If everyone will close your eyes
and say to the world your goodbyes
to hate, crime, and greed.
Take this moment to plant a seed
of love, light, and laughter,
what your soul is after…

 

To vision the color of blue…
Nirvana is inside of you.

 

© Sonya Rose

X-rayed with Kisses

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

The eyes will admire.
The ears will listen.
The mind will connect.
The body will touch.
The heart will capture-
The moment of lovers…

 

© Sonya Rose

Truth

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

He is standing in the corner.
His face smashed against the wall.
He is being punished…
for something he did not do at all.
I hear the children laugh
and the teachers yell.
The boy cries
from living in this school of hell.
In his world of darkness,
he paints a life of pain.
Every day to him
comes pouring rain.

 

I saw him the other day,
walking down the street.
For it was I-
he was going to meet.
I shook his hand;
So glad to have met…
Face to face,
we held each other and all night wept.
My name is Truth.
And I brought the Boy Blue-
the gift of love
for his Father, too.

 

© Sonya Rose

Not Yet Nine

December 21, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

The clock in the wall
never strikes twice-
pounding in my head,
rolling dice.
Is the lucky one me …
or the man in the sun?
His name is Jacob.
I know him a ton.
He owns a ladder;
But, shh! You mustn’t tell.
It’s a secret on high
and I his buyer will rebel…
Until the day I die…
and the ladder is mine.
My final step is not yet nine.

 

© Sonya Rose

Scream of the Butterfly

December 12, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

What is your birth name?
A number hidden in black flames.
A white cross
blowing in dross.
The center of existence
draws a circumference
around fluttering pages,
skipping through the ages;
miles long
of the millennium song-
never heard.
My knowledge of a word-
love-sent
in cities of detachment.
There are no rules,
no choices of schools.
Watch the season pass by
and greet the butterfly.
As she vanishes in the steeple,
so do the people.

 

© Sonya Rose

War and Peace

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

Different faces of devotion
flashed in front of the insane;
Reruns of commotion,
a royal mess in a major vein.
Cut off from opportunity,
tired souls fall over.
Will the world know war 3?
War and Peace—prisoner.

 

© Sonya Rose

Pleasure Streams

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

We know not
which way to run
in darken cellars.
We stand in a circle
of celebrations;
immune
by the vibrations
under our feet.
We feel a storm
is coming.
Yet we cannot see
the rain falling
from the skies…
over us, until
we have drown.

 

© Sonya Rose

Lie-in-Wait

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

An old-fashioned junkie
Swallowed once more-
parched on bended knee.
Shadow of recollections in his drawer-
of photographs next to a single bed.
Her rosy lips curled in disgust, the blur…
Breaths of two in one minute, fled-
Moments of mercy for her.
A nurse with emotions recalling…
She wonders alone, goddess of his lot.
Heart bleeds with sadness, bawling…
Hopes for something; knot-
in her tongue, hand on his face…
His gray-green eyes, barrier to lies,
no longer sparkled in this place.
He listened and heard, “Don’t die”.
The room rushed in, what-would-be.
Arm’s reach from a half-naked picture-
She’s feeding the hungry;
making plenty of men richer…
Stared at her the time apart, hesitantly…
Another chance to save him—code blue.
“Please just tell me…”
Speaking down a long, dark road, through-
The other side … swept into a glimpse of fate.
What else was in her power? The end-
of a love story … dare not, not to late…
to tell the man she hated then…
She did not wish for him to die.
Could not ignore his good deeds,
nor imagine love built on a lie.
Three minutes, she pleads….
Doom was at hand.
He wanted her to love him enough.
To leave him, let go of his hand…
Staying by his side was rough.
Her cherished smile and voice so sweet-
was all he ever wanted … not swallow the hurt.
Rushing in the rain … rising to shaky feet,
she dropped the rose and an angel fell, in the wet dirt…

 

© Sonya Rose

Seasons of Sorrow

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment


There was a time for us to laugh and cry.
How can I get by winter to see July?

 

There was a time when our garden grew.
How will I plant seeds without us two?

 

There was a time when the ocean was warm.
How do I swim without security in a storm?

 

There is a time when the leaves fall:
And a time for your soul to leave it all…

 

© Sonya Rose

Falling

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

Walking on broken glass,

my feet are bleeding

in the unexpected,

the uncontrolled.

Patterns are far…

 

So you awake in

fate’s numbers

and your life

is a looking glass.

 

© Sonya Rose

Fall

December 11, 2008 § Leave a comment

 

The wind screams.

The leaves dance

in the cold streams,

in ritual romance.

The sun seldom shines.

The last animal dines.

Behind a cloud

Fall takes off the shroud;

I feel the great chill coming.

The birds stopped humming.

 

© Sonya Rose

Smiles from Heaven

December 13, 2007 § 6 Comments

A Poetic Memoir / A Page of My Life


I sometimes lift my eyes to the setting sun.
Without paints, I create while on the run.
Every thought and every move, I find…spirit in eternal sands,
wisdom in wonderlands…
gripping my heart.
The waters allow me to start-
swimming in a current thought
deep beneath its forethought…
Beyond every wave,
every breath God gave-
reigns a silent kingdom;
a peaceful medium-
inner – unrhymed,
a complete up climb.
Oh, I close my eyes;
watch how time flies…
I see a familiar face
smiling…we’re not far from this place-
Heaven…Whatever you do-
Share your dreams with someone true…
the ones who love you…
who really love you.

© Sonya Rose

Yesterday’s Run

December 13, 2007 § Leave a comment

Close your eyes and see…
What will set you free?
Does the wind brush your face (anymore)?
…ever so softly in a special place?-
Listening to the waves
Come closer, they all crash in lonely caves…


A vision sprung by desire…
You have walked your soul through the mire.
Try to heal your wounds from the fire.
Balance your life on the wire.


Take that chance.
Learn to dance.


Never count those years-
Move on. Fight the tears…


Lift your wings to the sky
And fly…
Towards the sun-
Farewell yesterday’s run.
Farewell…farewell…farewell…


© Sonya Rose

Secret Screams

December 13, 2007 § 2 Comments

Her thoughts
which I decided to terminate
are one-dimensional
(primary thoughts),
all positive;
but, I covered all the bases-
positive and negative.


Why don’t you make up
a life story that you never lived?


Sounds like a plan…


Your luggage never gets lost
on an imaginary journey.


Clues are helpful;
negatives are helpful.


What went wrong…
people who are lying,
wanting the perfect details-
people who are not interested
in learning anything.


So sad, so long…


She only wants to convince
everyone around her
that her actions are righteous.


People who are truthful with me-
ask and answer questions.
I’m confident about what I said:
I don’t care how
now I appear to you…
I’m more interested in you
understanding me:
My focus was internal,
from the heart and mind
of a simple woman.


Do I bring you discomfort…
knowing that I know the truth?


We are all not innocent,
Saints included.
I do not resent you:
I feel sorry for you…


A personal truth needs
to be explored further;
maybe not now, but in the future.


The guilty wants me to forget-
change the subject:
mental abuse.


Most everyone goes into battle,
verbal combat unprepared…
You can think clearly,
effectively communicate…


Two days later
after the blow-out or blow-up,
I have no guilt
on writing little truths:
I only have pain.


The bullets I fired
seem war like-
arsenal, weapons of mine
are understandable-for the future;
What about yours?


It’s showtime.


Your lies and hatred are injurious
and I had to protect…
Well, if you want to enter a battle again
with me, be well armed.
I’ve had enough.


I don’t need you by my side:
I don’t need your love.
I won’t be thinking…
of a few names much after this.


Life isn’t easy.
I didn’t cause these problems;
but, you can stop them.
You have the power
and I won’t apologize to you
because what I said…
was the truth, again…
all I would have to do-
is soothe your ego.


I’ve only touched the surface.


You thank me first
before I apologize;
so much stress…
so much left behind…
The Divide.


She will never realize
how selfish she is:
one percent of the problem.


His heart, hers
unstandable upset…
touchy situation-
could have been handled
so differently…
I never accused;
I alluded…


He isn’t being truthful
with himself.
I do not need to comfort…
or say I’m sorry-
to those cheating life.


Why do I keep on writing…
because honor is questioned
and I’m free falling into something…
nothing I’ve written about
for the original thought
was being caught off guard.


Your answers to questions
are always rehearsed…
Don’t try to defend
what everyone knows;
you can’t change
unless you’re willing…


She really misses you…
how do you swallow it and…
let it go-
like it never happened?


I have nothing to think about…
The guilty confesses…
she can be mean.


Does it make you feel good
when you scream at everyone?
Does it make you feel…
superior?


He gets off on his screams…
has an excuse for all her actions.


Making excuses…
putting stuff in little minds.
(Stay focused…)


So much hate…
(Stay focused…)


How do you hate someone that bad…
feel that much hate?-
It’s super deep, super bad
(Stay focused…)


He’s mad.
Doing what you did is one thing;
we can get past that…
but lying about it
is something that I cannot deal with,
all too harmful.


Just be honest and we’ll be able
to put this whole thing behind us…


The divide is getting wider I see.


She hides behind the veil,
grabbing for the machine guns
to shoot anyone who comes close.


I don’t want to be around
that insecurity.


Until you come clean,
it won’t be possible for you
to continue shooting here…


The situation is not right
and you know it.
Why don’t you lie some more
to people out of embarrassment,
out of fear…


Putting the hate seed in-
heads, going along with it,
just as guilty.


How do you become awake…
eliminate those blockers
that keep you from seeing
what’s really going on?


You lie the loudest
when you lie to yourself,
softly…
the event of another storm.


I hate how it sounds…
Reality never changes…
only our perception of it;
so, how do you see it?


Bullets go through me;
I’m bleeding to death…
So quickly to wind everyone up…
never to hesitate once
you jump right away into the war.


Are you motivated to avoid pain
or you desire to gain pleasure…?


I’m slowly bleeding…
I’m losing sight…
are you-
of the personal truths…
out of anger and ignorance?


It is simple…
my benefit outweighs … lying.


Once, he finds out who he is-
who will comfort him: the coward?-
Under the influence of fear…


When I started writing…
I looked infront of me, inside me…
so many bullet holes…


Can you see the light now
shining inside of me?


Your judgment maybe-
impaired.


Somewhere out there … someone
is crying really hard; I’m bleeding…
You can’t make sense of it:
Don’t try.


I hear the screams…
all silent…
pain buried in faces…
so deep inside.
No one knows …
where they belong exactly-
their place in the world,
for where they are they don’t wish to be…


Somewhere out there
a mother loves her children so much…
and they don’t realize
or take the time to look within hearts…
Many mothers like this
and history repeats itself all over again
like it did centuries ago.


Cherish the good;
but, learn from your mistakes.
I have and didn’t even know I was making them.


Now, I’ve come, too, see more of the truth…
Go … go on … go on … and get buried-
he says to me.


Our families will never heal until…


…to forgive is not always easy.
How many more secrets…?
let’s shove more in the closet-
until it explodes.


From the outside, it’s beautifully white…
How dark inside…
how very dark.


I don’t mind dying…
there is always pain before birth.

 

© Sonya Rose

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